Last night, I woke up around two in the morning wanting Bill.
He had been to the vet earlier that day, and for whatever reason, I just really wanted him in bed with me. I wanted him close. So I started calling him.
“Bill. Bill.”
Nothing.
I called and called, and he wouldn’t come.
Eventually, I got out of bed and went looking for him. I found him perched on one of the dining room chairs, alone in the dark.
It was strange because I had never seen him sit there before.
I got down on my knees in front of him and looked into his eyes. Immediately, I knew something wasn’t right.
He looked sick. He looked sad. His breathing seemed shallow. He could barely keep his eyes open.
But he was purring.
That little purr gave me something to hold on to.
I picked him up, carried him into my bedroom, and laid him on the bed beside me. And then I decided I was going to try something I had never actually done before.
Reiki.
I am not a Reiki master. I am lucky enough to have two incredible Reiki practitioners in my life, and I have experienced what healing hands can feel like. I know the basic idea: presence, intention, energy, love.
So I put one hand on Bill’s tummy and the other near the back of his neck.
And I started talking to him.
You are healed.
You are healed.
You are healed.
You are loved.
You are loved.
You are loved.
You are nourished.
You are nourished.
You are nourished.
Over and over and over again.
Especially:
You are healed.
Then I started praying.
I asked God to lift Bill up. I asked God to hold him through whatever he was experiencing and carry him through to the other side of it, healthy and happy.
And somewhere in all of that fear, I became calm.
That may be one of my favorite things about having a Higher Power: there is somebody I can talk to at two o’clock in the morning when the house is dark and I am scared and I don’t know what to do.
I can hand over the part that I cannot control.
So I stayed there with my hands on Bill.
Eventually, I stopped saying the words out loud and simply repeated them in my head.
You are healed.
You are loved.
You are nourished.
And sometime after that, I fell asleep.
When I woke up again, Bill was stretching. He was moving around.
Then he stretched one little paw toward me.
So naturally, at this point, Bill and I were holding hands and doing Reiki together.
Because apparently he had been promoted.
We stayed like that for a while and eventually fell back asleep.
When I woke up this morning, he wasn’t in bed anymore. I got up, went to open his window, and suddenly there he was—running in.
Running.
He looked so much better.
And I cannot adequately explain the relief I felt. Only a few hours earlier, I had been lying there wondering whether he was having some kind of reaction to his vaccinations. I had been debating whether I needed to take him to the emergency vet. I was scared.
And now there was my Bill.
Moving. Stretching. Running toward his window.
I don’t need to know exactly what happened in those hours to know what I experienced.
I experienced the power of presence.
I experienced the power of prayer.
I experienced what happens when fear gets transformed into love because there is nowhere else for it to go.
And I experienced the beautiful gift of healing hands.
Sometimes healing hands may belong to a Reiki master.
Sometimes they may belong to a veterinarian.
Sometimes they may simply belong to someone sitting beside a creature they love at two o’clock in the morning saying:
You are healed.
You are loved.
You are nourished.
And maybe the greatest gift isn’t believing that our hands control the outcome.
Maybe it’s realizing that when someone we love is hurting, our hands can say what words cannot:
I am here.
You are not alone.
I will stay with you through this.
What a beautiful, beautiful gift.
